


Need You Now

by mukedayparade



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Angst, Break Up, M/M, Muke - Freeform, Mutual Pining, Sad Luke, Sad Michael, alcoholic michael
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-03
Updated: 2015-08-03
Packaged: 2018-04-12 06:32:23
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,458
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4468907
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mukedayparade/pseuds/mukedayparade
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>said I wouldn't call, but I've lost all control and I need you now.</p><p>or,</p><p>michael and luke broke up weeks ago, but neither of the boys are over the other</p>
            </blockquote>





	Need You Now

**Author's Note:**

> i actually like this a lot and i hope all of you do too!!   
> warning: there's a lot of instances of alcoholism in this so if that is something that upsets or triggers you, you may not want to read this.
> 
> based off the song need you now by lady antebellum

Luke couldn't help himself.

There he was, sitting on his bed, leafing through old photos of himself and Michael. He  _knew_ he shouldn't be doing this, he had promised himself he wouldn't delve back into these old memories, but he couldn't  _help_ himself. Looking at the photographs, the memories captured in film, only made his heart ache more. 

He missed Michael so much it physically  _hurt_. He'd barely left his apartment in the three weeks since the pair had broken things off, not having the energy to be out in the world. But this, this was a new low. 

He'd pulled out his Michael Box and begun to look through his old relationship, tugging on his own heartstrings. The blonde boy picked through the memories, tears splattering down onto the little key chain Michael had had made special for them, with L + M engraved onto it. He picked up a strip of pictures from the photo booth at the fair last spring, his watery eyes fixating on the snapshot of their lips pressed together. Michael had asked Luke to kiss him on the cheek for the final picture, but, at the last second, had turned his own head so that Luke's mouth landed on his own as opposed to his cheek. Luke's expression is surprised in the photo, his eyes blown wide. But Michael was smiling into the kiss, his eyes closed. Luke remembers that Michael had grabbed his hand during the kiss, which can't be seen in the photo, but is seared red-hot into his memory. The way Michael's fingers intertwined with his own as Luke melted into the kiss felt so  _right_.

Luke lifted up a photo of the two boys with their faces through the holes of a photo stand-in from the fair, Michael as Prince Charming and Luke as a princess. Luke had complained about being the girl, but had secretly loved having Michael as his Prince Charming. If only their relationship could have been a fairy tale.

⇇✧⇉

Michael downed yet another swallow from the bottle in his hand, having given up on pouring the alcohol into glasses long ago. He was unsure of what he was drinking at the moment-whiskey, he thought-since he had simply raided his liquor cabinet and begun drinking anything and everything. He had finished off his remaining beers yesterday, so tonight was solely hard liquor. Luke  _hated_ hard liquor, hated alcohol for the most part anyway. Michael knew it was largely because Luke knew from experience what it could do to someone, what it had done to  _Michael_. Luke hated how dependent his boyfriend could get on the liquid, and had tried his best to steer clear of it himself. 

The recurring thought of Luke made Michael take another drink. The whole point of this drinking-himself-into-a-stupor thing was to  _forget_ about missing Luke, not  _think_ about him. The black haired boy let out a groan, falling back into his pillows and ignoring the tears that burned his eyes. The pillow on the left side of the bed still smelled faintly of Luke, and he refused to wash it. It was the only thing that still held his scent, and Michael  _needed_ it sometimes. Luke was more addictive than the alcohol Michael needed to stay functioning. Luke was the only reason Michael had stayed sober for a while, because he didn't  _need_ it when he had him.

Michael felt his eyes drifting toward his open bedroom door, swallowing thickly at the memories playing in his mind. The times when Luke would stroll through that door on his way home from work to surprise his boyfriend, only to find Michael sitting there on this same bed doing this same thing-drinking. Luke would frown slightly, Michael would get teary and apologize but tell the blond boy that he  _couldn't help it_. Luke, of course, was understanding, and helped Michael get back on the wagon. He  _always_ helped Michael get sober again when he slipped up. Now no one even cared if he drank himself to death.

He wished he had his knight in shining armor to sweep in through his bedroom door and tell him he was worth  _so much more than that bottle_. Now, without Luke to tell him that, Michael wasn't sure it was true anymore.

⇇✧⇉

Maybe it wouldn't hurt if Luke just called. Just once, just one call to see if...well, he wasn't really sure what he wanted to find out. To find out if Michael was sober, to find out if Michael was thinking about him, to find out if Michael still  _loved_ him. All things he wanted to know, but had no idea how to find out. 

Luke had reached for his phone to call his ex boyfriend ten times tonight, but every time he set it back down and told himself to stop. He had even gone as far as clicking on Michael's contact, letting his thumb hover over the  _call_ button. But he didn't go through with it, didn't know what to say. He just wanted to hear his voice, listen to that beautiful sound that made him feel  _complete_.

⇇✧⇉

Michael fumbled for his phone, opening up his messaging app and clicking on Luke's name. It felt like  _so long_ since he'd had any contact with the other boy, it felt  _wrong_ to him that they hadn't spoken in weeks. Michael just needed to talk to him, he needed to be assured that he had a reason to  _live_ , a reason not to drink. It felt like there was no point in ever being sober anymore, without Luke telling him so.

**To: Luke**

**1:15 AM**

_**i msis yiu** _

Michael downed another sip of whatever drink he was on now, his vision going a little more blurry. 

**To: Luke**

**1:17 AM**

_**i canr stip dribkung. i dnot hqve a reqsom to stsy spber** _

Michael hoped Luke would answer, he couldn't bear the thought of the blond ignoring his messages. What if Luke didn't even  _care_? What if he was with someone else?

⇇✧⇉

Luke grabbed his buzzing phone off his bedside table, where he'd set it down to reduce his temptation. 

**From: Michael**

**1:15 AM**

_**i msis yiu** _

**1:17 AM**

_**i canr stip dribkung. i dnot hqve a reqsom to stsy spber** _

Luke's eyes widened, his teeth immediately going to bite on the ring through his lip. So that answered at least two of his questions; Michael was thinking about him, and he was  _certainly_ not sober.

Luke didn't think, he just clicked on Michael's contact and hit the  _call_ button, pressing the phone to his ear. His heart thumped as he listened to it ring.

"'Ello?"

"Michael?"

"Lu?"

Luke shuddered at the slurring of Michael's words and at the old nickname.

"Mhm, it's me. Are you okay, Mike?"

"Nuh-uh." Michael giggled. "I-I  _miss_ you, Lu." 

Luke's heart ached at the way Michael childish tone melted into a tearful one. Michael  _missed him_. 

"I-I miss you too, Mike." Luke swallowed hard.

"I haven' stupped drinkin' since we br-" Michael hiccuped, interrupting himself. "broke up."

"Michael."

"Y-you're the 'nly reason I didn't drink."

"Michael, babe."

"I don' know what to  _do_ , Lu. I wan' you  _back_."

"Michael," Luke's voice shook. "you're drunk. You have no idea what you're saying."

"You an' I  _both_ know that I can think  _fine_ when 'm drunk."

"Mike."

"'re you with someone  _else_?"

"What? No, Michael, no. I haven't seen anyone else."

"Me neither. I just wanna be with you."

"Michael, we broke  _up_. We-we can't do this. We-I promised myself I wouldn't call, I promised I wouldn't go back to you."

"So you don't miss me?"

Luke's heart hurt at how  _sad_ the other boy sounded.

"No, no, of  _course_ I do. But we-"

"If  _you_ miss  _me_ , and  _I_ miss  _you_ , why can't we?"

" _Because_ , uh-um..."

"You don't even have a reason."

"I just," Luke took a deep breath, his voice growing quiet. "I can't go through all of this again. I can't get back together only to have my heart broken again."

"I'm not going to break your heart, Luke, not again. I-I'll get better, I will. I'll stop drinking, I just-I need your help." 

"I want to help, Michael, I  _do_. But I tried to help for so long, and you just-"

"I can  _stop_. I promise, I-I'll do  _anything_ to have you back. I need you more than I need to drink."

Luke swallowed, the silence thick. 

"I need you, too. So much."

"Please come over. Please."

"I...I don't-"

"Please, Lu. I  _need_ you, now."

The line was silent for a few heart-pounding seconds. The only sound was each of the boys breathing heavily on either end.

"I...I'm on my way."


End file.
